Ever wondered why we behave the way we behave and later sometimes it makes us regret how we reacted during some of the conversations.
Feeling sorry for the 25 years old couple fighting over something very silly on their 25th marriage anniversary in front of the guests. That literally spoils your day, ahan!
Many people have some shortcomings resulting thereafter guilt but now it’s actually time to move past those and be the one to change the direction of conversations. So, in this post, I’m gonna broadcast “5 simple ways to master the everyday martial art of talking to someone who disagrees with you.”
First things first, we are always supposed to know what it actually means to listen. Being infants, our paradigms were nothing else than some infinitely spaced empty hard drive and then we did something we were deliberately intended to do, we listened.
See, listening deliberately is a powerful dimension of one’s character. So, to not make it conspicuous for the folks involved in the nascent conversation that this conversation is gonna make you feel ill at ease in the end, let us Escucha primero.
(pro tip: It would be a kindness on your part when you don’t interrupt someone when they are speaking. While it’s your turn to listen to others of what they are trying to express in their words, you should analyze and understand the depth of the phenomenon.)
“My imagination functions much better when I don’t have to speak to people.”Patricia Highsmith
#2. Exchanging shoes: This one’s a magic trick. If you ever want to express something about anyone but you do not want them to feel that woe-woe, you are in need of exchanging your shoes aka place of situation. For about a split second, think of yourself in his/her place and now envisage how things would go or how would you feel if the same trauma/ecstasy went in with you.
Think. Feel. Change.
Don’t forget to exchange your shoes with the people you want to say something that’s a hard truth about them.
#3. Follow the norm: Before it happens, stop it there!
The best way to never offend someone over your perspective about something that you both have been talking about is to begin your answer or suggestion with “According to me..”, or ” What I personally feel..” or maybe ” I think you’re right in your place and I have a different perspective about it” and so on. Like this you can butter-up your conversation towards a more healthy destination.
Try to remain calm. Calmness gives you Sukoon( Hindi for peace). Whenever it happens that you think you feel offended by someone else’s words about you or your ideas, take three deep breaths and feel free ( Feel free to read ‘If you seek to break free, count to three’). The shawarma about breathing deep is that you actually acknowledge that it’s hard to accept the truth but you’re on your way for it. According to a group experiment a few years ago, it was claimed that when we try to remain calm, it helps us achieve a lababdar understanding of other’s pov’s( point of views). It helps us attain a greater level of conversation and makes it flawless.
#5. Last but not least. Learn:
That whatever starts with us and ends up within us, would probably result in less self-improvement than something that starts with us and ends nowhere. Now, you would jab me in the face with ‘ Rishabh, what does that even mean?’
Don’t bother. What I mean to say is that if there is a purpose for doing what you’re doing, it would end up never ending. If you do things in life, that you do because you are keen to know the insides, lean towards learning, they will reside in you as a part of yours and would guide you towards the fabrication of your character.
So, next time you’re part of some conversation, you should think of it as an experience, as it might have the power to inculcate so many questions, so many answers, and can change your pov about life.
Thanks for reaching out of comfort and for trying to understand. Shukraan for reading, and fighting, and learning, and loving.
Talk yourself, SomeoneFromUniverse.